The Liberal Gun Club Forum

Myat wrote: Sat Apr 11, 2020 7:01 am D25B01E8-1D8C-4E50-89E9-B588D5771E56.jpeg

Nah...OANN will that first!

Two nuns riding bicycles through the back streets of Paris. First nun says, “I’ve never come this way before.”

“It’s the cobblestones.”

a guy I know tells this joke a lot

Mother Superior is in the convent, when she hears a knock at the door. She opens the door and is shocked to see two leprechauns standing at the threshold, hats in hand. The first leprechaun speaks, "Mother Superior, would you be having any leprechaun nuns in this convent?"
"No, my son. We have no leprechaun nuns in this convent."

"And mother, do you have any leprechaun nuns in all of Ireland?"

"No my son, I don't believe there's a single leprechaun nun in the whole church!"

The first leprechaun rounds on his companion and shouts, "AH TOL' YE YOU'D BEEN FOOKIN' A PENGUIN!"

Maybe Trump is an Alien

The two statements on the bottom are exactly the same

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...and starring Alec Baldwin in his most famous role as DiC--(Doofus-in-Chief).

MoscowMitch for his COVID19 Exam

A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student female nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath.

"Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."

He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?"

Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and
pulls back the covers. She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other. She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine."

The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly, "Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very,
very, closely: "Are - my - test - results - back?"

That’s a great joke. My wife told that to us on a group text with her dad.

Her dad went to the doctor several years back. As he tells it, “the doctor came into the room and said I need a urine test.” ‘A urine test? Why do I need a urine test?’

“The doctor replied, ‘I said you need a hearing test.’”

True story.

bajajoaquin wrote: Mon Apr 13, 2020 8:13 pm That’s a great joke. My wife told that to us on a group text with her dad.

Her dad went to the doctor several years back. As he tells it, “the doctor came into the room and said I need a urine test.” ‘A urine test? Why do I need a urine test?’

“The doctor replied, ‘I said you need a hearing test.’”

True story.

Uncle Bob's story is great! Yours is better! (Because it's real!)

Letter to the Editor today in my town.

Pandemic Update: We are 10 days into self-isolation and it is really upsetting me to witness my wife staring through the kitchen window with tears running down her cheeks.

It breaks my heart to see her like this. I have thought very hard about how I can cheer her up. I have even considered letting her in — but rules are rules.

And this reminds me of Steve McQueen jumping that border fence.


CDFingers

CDFingers

Deleted My apologizes

that's it, i'm plucking my eyes out right n...OW!

No, just friggin no.

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lot of fat shaming going on here. Please stop

Hiker wrote:lot of fat shaming going on here. Please stop

Thank you.

TrueTexan wrote:

Hah! How about one with thousands of tiny bullseyes on the car for lovebug season?

Hiker wrote: Fri Apr 17, 2020 9:15 am lot of fat shaming going on here. Please stop

agreed. not funny